I Watched The News

My friend had been telling me that she hadn't watched the news all week and didn't know anything going on in world. She said she felt so good to not know any of the depressing stuff. I always watch the news, but I had also been out of touch, except for the daily weather check, which I might add is quite depressing on it's own. (105 the next couple of days, even for Texas that's BAD)

I decided I should catch up. As I watched I began to be sucked in by the desolating evening news. Let me give you a run down- another war, drought, heat wave, crops burning up, shootings, tsunami's...feeling better yet?

Then a flicker of "hope", a Mary Kay National Sales Director was interviewed at Seminar who made a million dollars last year. Sounds good unless you were in Mary Kay and know out of a million people in the company she is the only one that did it, and at this stage in her business, the people under her made that money for her. What did she have to do to get there? Well, there are qualifications and I am sure SHE did it the way Mary Kay would have wanted her to. I do know others who have obtained the same position and it isn't as easy or always done as ethically as it seems. But what is now days? As she was being interviewed the National Sales Director repeated famous words of leadership given by Mary Kay which was, "you should give your job away." "You need to be duplicatible so that other people want to do what you do." I know this is what Mary Kay wanted, but unfortunately and sadly she is not around any more so things tend to get watered down. In 5 years of Sales Directorship I never had anyone want to give their job away until it was time for them to aspire to the position of National Sales Director. When they got to that position their job was done. Used up emotionally and monetarily I left management 1 year later. So you can see why this supposedly upbeat story wasn't very upbeat to me. I spent 8 years of my life loyal to the company and to the people I helped put in higher positions than myself. I gained alot in that company, but I received no help or encouragement to further my position after they reached theirs. Isn't that what Mary Kay is all about, helping others? This is the 1st Seminar in 8 years I haven't attended. As I sat and watched it might as well be an earthquake report as far as I am concerned. I didn't mean to go on this sidebar, but I think that was the last blow to me. Memories are still fresh and wounds I thought had healed are still tender.

After this 30 minute segment I can say I was pretty depressed. My husband walked in and said what's wrong? (probably because I looked like I was going to cry) I replied, "I watched the news."

The Devil Wears Prada

I just got back from watching "THE DEVIL WEARS PRADA" with a few friends of mine. While it was fresh in my head I thought would share my feelings on this movie. I was worried at first that I might give something "away" by sharing my take on the end of the movie, but based on the amount of comments I receive, I am pretty sure that no one reads my blog and that it is totally for me. If someone by chance happens to stumble upon, my advice is stop now if you haven't seen it and don't want to know what happens. Okay.... with that off my chest I feel I can continue.

As I watched this movie, it reminded me a lot of myself at several juntures in my life. Young wanting that break and wanting to succeed. (although my job was NO WHERE near that cool) I worked as an administrative assistant for an incredible asshole. The only difference was it was a man. It was more acceptable for him to be a tyrant...because he was a man. One day he turned on me and decided he could find someone to kiss ass better, (I was never good at that) and black listed me where he had the power, making it difficult to find another job within the same company. I finally succeeded in finding a job in a different area and was much happier with my less stress job. It was easy, but I couldn't see myself at this place forever doing something I totally was not interested in. I quit and went into something I had lost the clue about a long time ago....cosmetics. If you have seen the movie you will know the character in which I parallel. I didn't fit in at first, and then I figured it out. I dressed better, I looked more professional and felt more confident. I knew names of designers and could actually tell you if they designed jewelry or handbags. I actually cared about wearing lipstick and husband was wondering, "who is this person I married?" I dressed the part I thought I should be and began to want to be. At the end of the movie the "devil" says," This is what everybody wants, who wouldn't want to be like us?"
At that point the young assistant realizes she has given up her values and the people she loves. Instead of following her boss she gets out of the car and walks the opposite direction. When her Blackberry rings, she sees her bosses name on caller id and throws it into a fountain in Paris. (I am sure there is a name for this fountain, but I am not up on my architecture) I took her answer to be "I don't want to be like everybody else and if I don't do this I will have lost myself ending up being a horrible person. She was miserable because she was bound to her job. She had stuck around however, being sucked in by money, labels, and status. She was a slave. At one point, one of the characters said"when your personal life begins to crumble you know it's time for a big promotion" Oh is that true! I have watched it happen.
I thought the title of this movie meant that Meryl Streep was the Devil because, she was a bitch to work for and she wore Prada. Hello? I guess I am slow but it finally dawned on me that the poor girl sold her soul to the devil, (Meryl Streep) for cool stuff, and a chance for that awesome job we always dreamed of. How many of us do that? We do things we don't want because we think we have to. We let our true happiness go to be something we aren't. It might be rewarding and fun for a while, but then it is just hell.
The cosmetics job is no longer in the picture. I felt in a way I sold my soul. I changed who I was for stuff and a title. For the moment I feel like I have come to my senses. I get to enjoy my family and friends. This past year I have done a lot of soul searching, because I have felt so conflicted about being a mom and not a career girl like I always wanted. This is something I am sure many women deal with. For me I think as much as I love the other side of life, my children are going to be much happier that I am with them, instead of the mom that is gone all the time to that awesome job. I am a much happier and more content person than I ever was then. We have one life and I guess we have to choose how we want to be remembered and be happy with that decision. For right now I think I am making the right decision.

The Story of My Life

I am not sure but somehow I think there is a curse over my head when it comes to me having fun or spending money. Yeah you guessed it. I am going out of town and another castrophy has occured. When this happens the plans I have to get everything done before my scheduled departure go out the window.

Let me set the scene. My friend asked me if I wanted to go on a "scrapbooking weekend" at the last minute on Wednesday. I talked to my husband about it and assured him the money I would be spending for this excursion would do us a lot of good. I wouldn't have any more of the kids school work laying around in that pile of stuff that's for a rainy day. In Texas, lately, that means the pile will never get touched since we have hardly had a drop in months. He seemed to think that it would be worth it and we proceeded to find a baby sitter for the day he would be at work. Well, of course his parents were 1st on the list since mine were out of town. I wasn't going to hold my breath because the likelyhood of them saying yes was not usually in our favor. (That's another blog in itself!) Tim calls them up and his dad is asking when they can come visit and Tim popped the question. His dad says yeah that would be great, his mom says no, I have a potluck to cook for. (They live in a new retirement community, enough said.) The few minutes of excitement and shock that they would be able to see them were immediatly doused by her addmission.
Later that evening when I kissed my kids as they were sleeping I just felt sorry for them (his parents) because they are missing out on these children that growing up so fast. Anyway... back to the story

We finally worked out that he could come home early from work if we could leave a little later...problem solved, or so we thought. I had just told my friend the good news, she booked me. Then only a few short hours later Tim's car broke. It is parked next door in front of the neighboor's house because the gearshift would only go in reverse.

So instead of me getting everything ready this morning (after going to bed at 1pm) I have been calling tow companies and auto repair places. I finally successfully found a tow truck and they came and picked up "Oco" (what my kids named Tim's car). It was a big event. The kids thought it was really cool watching they tow truck load poor Oco on it's back. They jumped for joy and cheered when the mission was completed. My son yelled, "By tow truck, by Oco!" as the truck pulled our car away.

So now here I am blogging instead of getting ready. I have 1 hour to finish getting ready. The story of my life!